20100828.014 WHO AM I ANYWAY?
Hello all! As with many of my BLOGs, I have been writing this one in my head. And the time has come to finally commit it to the written word so that it can be solidified. The title comes from a song from the musical “A CHORUS LINE” and will make sense once I share with you the point of this particular BLOG. But first let me quote the words to this song. (Let me also note that if you search for (“chorus line who am i” on www.youtube.com you will find several versions and the melody is nice to listen to as well as the meaning of the words.)
Who am I anyway? Am I my resume? That is a picture of a person I don’t know. What does he want from me? Who should I try to be? So many faces all around that I don’t know. Now here we go. I hope I get this show.
The reasoning behind the title of this BLOG coming from this particular song is because I have been wrestling with the question, “WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE GAY?” You would think that once someone declares that they are gay, they should know what that is, but I am discovering more and more people who think they know the meaning of the term “GAY” and in reality have no clue. And that includes those who are “family.” Let me explain. Recently I received an email/message from a friend who made the claim, “As someone who has had more boyfriends than you, we can both agree that I can be pretty gay at times, right?” And this particular “friend” is correct, he has had more boyfriends than me. Of course, when you really think about it, I think Mother Theresa has had more boyfriends than me! But I digress. In actuality, my friend is bisexual and declares himself as such. The real point I want to make is that having sex with someone of the same gender doesn’t make you gay. In fact, to borrow from the joke that Dan Savage used in: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajR9PLvN73k “You build a thousand bridges and nobody calls you an engineer, but suck one cock, . . . [and you are gay]” From my view, the truth of the matter is that it takes more than just same gender sex to equate someone as being gay. I think that being gay includes, but is not limited to, the ways you think, the ways you feel, and the ways you experience life in all of its vast diversity. In fact, I would have to confess that there are thousands of ways, if not millions of ways, of defining “same gender” sexuality. And the myriad of gays in this world embody all of these defining characteristics to greater and lesser degrees.
And to redirect my “friend” should he be reading this, there are also millions of defining characteristics of what makes someone bisexual, which I think differs than what makes someone gay. Now, I will be the first to admit that I am neither a sociologist nor an anthropologist, and I have no credentials to validate this philosophy. But, speaking as one who defines them selves with the term of “GAY” I do think I have the right to at the very least put in two cents. What validation do I have? I have my own feelings, my own thoughts, my own experiences which are unique to me. And for that reason alone, I think I have the right to speak on such an issue. Of course, I would be glad for any comments you would want to leave me concern these views. Because, I also believe that understanding and belief comes from discourse with others! And so, to answer the question that the title poses, “WHO AM I ANYWAY?” I am ME! And that is saying QUITE A LOT! Blessings to you all - David L.
Hello all! As with many of my BLOGs, I have been writing this one in my head. And the time has come to finally commit it to the written word so that it can be solidified. The title comes from a song from the musical “A CHORUS LINE” and will make sense once I share with you the point of this particular BLOG. But first let me quote the words to this song. (Let me also note that if you search for (“chorus line who am i” on www.youtube.com you will find several versions and the melody is nice to listen to as well as the meaning of the words.)
Who am I anyway? Am I my resume? That is a picture of a person I don’t know. What does he want from me? Who should I try to be? So many faces all around that I don’t know. Now here we go. I hope I get this show.
The reasoning behind the title of this BLOG coming from this particular song is because I have been wrestling with the question, “WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE GAY?” You would think that once someone declares that they are gay, they should know what that is, but I am discovering more and more people who think they know the meaning of the term “GAY” and in reality have no clue. And that includes those who are “family.” Let me explain. Recently I received an email/message from a friend who made the claim, “As someone who has had more boyfriends than you, we can both agree that I can be pretty gay at times, right?” And this particular “friend” is correct, he has had more boyfriends than me. Of course, when you really think about it, I think Mother Theresa has had more boyfriends than me! But I digress. In actuality, my friend is bisexual and declares himself as such. The real point I want to make is that having sex with someone of the same gender doesn’t make you gay. In fact, to borrow from the joke that Dan Savage used in: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajR9PLvN73k “You build a thousand bridges and nobody calls you an engineer, but suck one cock, . . . [and you are gay]” From my view, the truth of the matter is that it takes more than just same gender sex to equate someone as being gay. I think that being gay includes, but is not limited to, the ways you think, the ways you feel, and the ways you experience life in all of its vast diversity. In fact, I would have to confess that there are thousands of ways, if not millions of ways, of defining “same gender” sexuality. And the myriad of gays in this world embody all of these defining characteristics to greater and lesser degrees.
And to redirect my “friend” should he be reading this, there are also millions of defining characteristics of what makes someone bisexual, which I think differs than what makes someone gay. Now, I will be the first to admit that I am neither a sociologist nor an anthropologist, and I have no credentials to validate this philosophy. But, speaking as one who defines them selves with the term of “GAY” I do think I have the right to at the very least put in two cents. What validation do I have? I have my own feelings, my own thoughts, my own experiences which are unique to me. And for that reason alone, I think I have the right to speak on such an issue. Of course, I would be glad for any comments you would want to leave me concern these views. Because, I also believe that understanding and belief comes from discourse with others! And so, to answer the question that the title poses, “WHO AM I ANYWAY?” I am ME! And that is saying QUITE A LOT! Blessings to you all - David L.
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